It’s all over folks. The last lazy day has drawn to a close and we are now being dragged, kicking and screaming, into the autumn term.
I hope the rain didn’t stop you from enjoying yourselves over the holidays. It certainly didn’t stop me. But as a result of all those wet afternoons I am about to launch into the mother of all clean up operations.
That’s not to say I haven’t been keeping on top of the mess. On the contrary. I have happily tidied up at the end of each day and cheerily wiped the paint off the floor. I have gleefully unblocked the sink of chalk sticks and was still smiling (through headache inducing gritted teeth) when I scrubbed the ‘washable’ felt tip marks off the sofa...Oh how I love cleaning. NOT.
...8 mississippi, 9 mississippi, 10 mississippi…
So now the children have returned to school and left me alone in the house for a few precious hours I can really get to work.
Gone are those pesky bits of Lego that my bare feet keep standing on, making me howl like a fallen wolf. Into the box they go. Whoops, one just got sucked up by the hoover. Oh well...
Chucked are those wretched Barbie dolls and their teeny tiny shoes, whose hair is so backcombed and frizzy that birds have been known to try nesting there.
Packed up are those huge cuddly Peppa and George Pigs that have been sitting on the window ledge being fiercely protected at any mention of the charity shop yet blissfully ignored at all other times. Snort snort.
Banished are the paints and the brushes and the sponges to the garage far, far away from eager little hands. Ha ha ha ha haaaaa (in the style of a grotesquely evil pantomime baddie).
Yes, I could get really into this. As a rule I hate to throw things away, but this silence and freedom to reclaim my home is strangely liberating and is taking me over. At this rate there will be nothing left by the time they get home. Just an empty, clean, shell of a house. Imagine it? With a few candles that is. And lamps. And a lovely sofa and our gorgeous beds...
Of course I am not that cruel. Some decent storage will always do the trick to lull me into a false sense of minimalism (a word that is only ever used to describe your future furnishing plans when you have two messy children). The quicker I can create my peaceful, tidy haven each morning the better. Five minutes of grabbing and storing is all it takes with my lovely boxes and bags. It’s easy.
Ok then, on reflection the Barbies can stay but I draw the line at the pigs.
As for the Leg-ooooooooooooooooo! My foot!!! The hoover will see to that.